Sunday, December 2, 2012

3 Babies n a Lady..

2003 at 15 I didn't understand what it meant to b a mom. 2007 I still wasn't sure but I understood my position. 2011 abortion wasn't an option for me... 2012 came the balancing ... Outside of being a mother I'm still me. I did not understand that. I couldn't identify me. Finally when I did I realized how beautiful of a person "me" truly was. True "me" wasn t perfect but everyone has flaws... I'm sure I would make a good wife one day ... But strangely, as odd as it may sound, I was told being a wife is something I may never be. Y u ask? Well see back in 2003, 2005 and 2011 I made a decision that apparently has voided the option of me being a wife. When I signed birth certificates apparently I became disqualified to being a mother. O_o "well, it's still a possibility but it's gonna b hard." The subject never bothered me I speak of my children with such pride because I am proud. Proud to be there mom. Proud to have them as mine ... Maybe it's hard for someone who hasn't experienced them to understand the love I have for them but to say I won't b married because I have 3 children.... Wow. My feelings were hurt ... My children are not a burden and shouldn't been seen as such. "What if he doesn't have kids" "I have three n I can share" "What if he wants a child or two" "God will give us what is meant for us" I don't understand this. My children are mine. Is everyone around me so perfect that their past has no affect on the future? No skeletons? I chose to accept responsibility for my actions. Chose not to take the easier road, n subsequently I'm punished. Amazing. A burden to him is a blessing to me. Each of my children represent a blessing not a burden n any person (man or woman) who has an issue, question or concern with it can easily b removed from my life without question. Point fingers when ur hands are clean. 

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